Life in TSW is rough. You never know when you are going to get a good day, how long this thing will take, or whether you will feel better or worse in 1 hour. It is a roller coaster for sure.
I’ve been thinking about my roller coaster ride of TSW a lot these days. I’m at the very very end of it. I’m still hesitating to say I’m healed. I think I will always have eczema. I was told when I started TSW that my eczema would be gone and I would have “movie star skin”. I don’t have perfect skin and I probably never will. But today, my skin is even better than it was on steroids. To tell the truth, my original eczema wasn’t even that bad. It didn’t get bad until I went to a dermatologist and got prescription topical steroids. Before that, it was confined to very small parts of my body. I have learned a lot about managing stress, which was also a big part of having original eczema flare ups.
Would I do it any differently?
I have no doubt I made the right decision. I have no regrets. Yes, I suffered. Yes, it was absolute hell. But guess what? I haven’t filled a prescription in 10 months. I’m no longer a frequent visitor at Walgreens. I haven’t taken a prescription medicine in who knows how long. I no longer spend hundreds or thousands of dollars on medicine and doctors. I am happy and healthy. When I see how crazy my body went when I went off steroids, it became so apparent the damage that they did to my body. If my body reacted that way (hospitalized for 5 days for pneumonia), clearly my body couldn’t handle them.
I don’t have any body skin pictures to show this blog entry because there isn’t anything to show. I wish there was a way for me to show you how smooth and supple my skin feels. Aside from my arms, my skin is completely normal and feels like C’s skin!
I do have a picture of us after I received an award for pro bono attorney of the year. I had to put a hold on my pro bono activities and career altogether when I got sick. Once I started recovering, I was able to get back to doing the things that I am passionate about. My wife was there with me to support me, just like she has been through all of this.
Also, I took head shots for work this week. I got heavy makeup done. I was really nervous about it. They weren’t worried about how pale I was, but I needed some color. My skin had no reaction, which is crazy! Everyone kept raving about how pretty and photogenic I am, which was extremely awkward for me. I have taken so many horrifying selfies of myself over the past two years that the thought of being photographed under bright lights is a bit scary!
Pre-TSW Leslie was a very strong person. Going through TSW Leslie (as documented here) was an absolute mess. I think Post TSW Leslie is going to be a badass strong woman that no one can take down. If you followed my blog through my withdrawal, you probably thought “This chick is never going to get better”. And I am here to tell you all that it does get better!
Happy healing skin friends. Those better days are coming!